last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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