My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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