how hairy? two words: wookie tits
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
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