it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
