I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize