My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
