aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I said "one day" and that day is not today
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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