well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
