Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
