you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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