Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(503): View more from Oregon

can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?

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(512): View more from Texas

We need to rekindle our bromance

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(480): View more from Arizona

I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.

(602): View more from Arizona

you slept with him again didn't you

(480): View more from Arizona

you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.

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(716): View more from New York

I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man

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(734): View more from Michigan

Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks

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(909): View more from California

I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.

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(303): View more from Colorado

He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.

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