He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
