Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
