I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
my poor anus
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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