saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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