I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize