There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
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