I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
