I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize