Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize