We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
