WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
