Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
