I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
