she looked like the bat from fern gully.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize