Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
