Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
