Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
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