More tranny stories later!
We're like a lot better than the average bears
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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