i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
