Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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