Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Randomize
