The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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