did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
