I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Randomize
