I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
You left your phone here
Wait...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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