I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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