Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I need moral support for this bender
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
