problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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