All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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