We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize