yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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