i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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