Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Let's paint friendship bongs
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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