And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Randomize
