He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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