I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I am naked and annoyed.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
