Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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