I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
