currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
