She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
